I'm Sorry
by ILoveHLaurie
Summary: He wanted to go in there, hold her in his arms and tell her that everything was going to be alright. But he couldn't. - House needs to say sorry, so he does in the only way he knows how. Slight fluff at the end.


_A/N - So this was just a little (sort of) song fic that I thought of when I was listening to that great song by Tommy Reeve. It really is a great song and I think it's exactly what House would say if he could; especially after he messes up. It might get a bit fluffy or a little OOC at the end, but that's just the way I write, so don't say I didn't warn you! Hope you enjoy it! x_

_Disclaimer: I don't own House MD or any of the characters. I also don't own Tommy Reeve. _

**I'm Sorry**

Saying sorry wasn't something that Gregory House was good at. He was one of these people who mess up a lot, and even though they may feel sorry afterwards, those two words can't seem to fall from their lips. It was probably pride more than anything, but sometimes, it's all you really need to say.

It had been a bad day, not to mention a bad week, for House. Yesterday patient had died, just before he and his team figured out what was wrong. He knew he should have known what was wrong, and all day he'd been cooped up in his office sulking. He was angry more than anything, because he should have got the diagnosis faster.

To make matters worse, he had to sit and watch Allison Cameron beat herself up about it too.

Chase and Forman were angry because they let a patient die, but busied themselves with the clinic or the ER, but Cameron sat around in the conference room doing paperwork, not really focusing on the task. She too, knew she should have got that diagnosis faster.

House watched in agony as she shed a tear and continued to go over the case in her head.

Every time she sniffled with sadness, House's heart took another blow and he winced when he heard he quiet sobs. He hated seeing her like this. She was always upset when a patient died, but she was particularly attached to this girl and it had affected her probably more than anyone else. He wanted to go in there, hold her in his arms and tell her that everything was going to be alright, but he couldn't.

He saw he get up quietly out of her chair and walk over to the coffee machine. She took out two mugs and stood in silence as the machine rumbled softly. After a while, she made her way into his office, opening the door slowly.

"House?" she asked as she entered the room partly. "I made you coffee."

House looked up and finally saw her blotchy face, still damp from the tears. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, and she looked exhausted.

"Thank you" He said softly as she placed it on his desk. "How you holdin' up?"

His eyes met hers and she sighed deeply.

"That good, huh?" he said, trying to lighten the mood and he succeeded as Cameron smiled weakly. "Do you wanna talk?"

At first, both House and Cameron were surprised by his words. He was actually being caring. But Cameron shook her head.

"No, it's alright. You don't need to do that…"

"Do what?"

"Act differently because I'm upset."

House felt a bit hurt. He wasn't acting differently just because she was upset. He was acting differently because she was Cameron – his Cameron, and she was hurting. She was hurting and he cared.

"Well, sorry for caring." He said, colder than he'd expected too.

"I'm a professional doctor, House. I know that sometimes, patients are going to die, but it doesn't stop it hurting, even a little bit." she snapped.

"I know." he said softly.

"And I don't need you patronizing me or feeling sorry for me because it's hits me harder than the others. I don't want special attention and I don't want to be treated differently."

House inhaled sharply and he looked away from her intense gaze. He didn't want her to be hurting any more, but his efforts to try and ease her pain, were being shot down. Something inside him seemed to snap. He was trying the best he could, and she couldn't see it.

"If you don't want to be treated differently, then why do you hang around sniffling and crying like some…2 year old, while the others are busying themselves and trying to keep their minds off it?" he snapped, standing from his chair.

"Patients die, Cameron. If you haven't figured that out by now, then you're not as smart as I thought you were. Patients die and sometimes it's out of our control. If we cried every time we didn't get there in time, then we wouldn't have any time to do anything else."

Cameron stared at House, not knowing what to do, but he continued.

"This is why I keep my distance from patients. You, you want everyone to think you're the most caring doctor who would do anything to save their precious lives, but when things go wrong and you can't keep your promise that 'everything will be alright' then you're the one they blame. You just put an extra burden on your shoulders by caring."

House continued to stare into her eyes, her gaze never leaving his. Eventually he sighed and sat back down in his chair. He felt a bit guilty for shouting at her, but he was trying to be even a little bit nice and she didn't want to know.

"Oh, well I'm sorry House, but sometimes the little bit of human in me takes over and I can't control who I care about. Take you for example, you're sarcastic and rude, but I care about you and I don't know why." shouted Cameron, louder than she wanted to. "Just because you don't give a damn about anyone, doesn't mean other people aren't allowed to care!"

House looked at her, and from the look on her face, she hadn't meant to say all that. He was glad she cared about him, because he cared about her.

"I care about you. I care that you're upset…" said House quietly.

"But you don't! You just feel sorry for me because I'm the girl who's crying." she paused and closed her eyes and sighed before continuing.

"Sometimes if you care about someone, there seems to be a little more hope that they're actually going to be alright, because they're not just a patient – they're a person." she said softly, tears welling up in her eyes again.

House got up again and moved around his desk so he could stand in front of her. His eyes searched her eyes to try and figure out how she felt. Was she angry at him?

"Cameron…" he whispered and moved his hand to her arm that was folded across her chest. She pulled away sharply and House sighed.

"Don't House, just…don't." Cameron waved her arm and then left, tears falling from her eyes again.

House stared after her, contemplating whether to go after her or let her let off some steam. After watching her disappear down the corridor, House slammed his fist down on the desk. He closed his eyes and sighed through gritted teeth. Seeing Cameron like that made his insides do flips. It was so…unnatural and unnerving that it shook him up quite deeply. He hated himself for snapping at her and he wanted to run after her and apologize.

'_She'll be gone by now'_ he thought and thumped his fist against the desk once more.

It was only 3'o'clock in the afternoon, but Cameron decided to just go home. She didn't really want to talk to anyone again that day, and all she wanted to do was snuggle on the sofa in her fluffy pyjamas with a glass of wine and a tub of ice-cream.

Driving home, she thought about what House had said to her. He said that he cared she was upset. She sighed when she remembered some of the stupid things she'd said to him. She'd been a bit of a bitch of she was honest. He even asked her if she wanted to talk, and what had she done? - shouted at him for feeling sorry for her. What if he really was concerned? What if he'd meant what he said?

"Damn it!" she muttered, hitting the steering wheel with her palms. "He was trying so hard."

* * *

Later that evening, Cameron felt terrible. Although she'd watched 3 Tom Hank's films, and gone through two tubs of ice cream, she didn't feel any better about the situation. Even thought she still felt crap because of the death of their patient, she felt bad mostly because of her argument with House. When he tried to be human for one second, she shot him down, which must have lowered his self esteem. He was trying to be caring and she snapped at him. She felt so guilty and even considered ringing him to apologize.

However bad Cameron felt, House felt 5 times worse. He was still kicking himself for not getting the diagnosis in time, but also because of some of the things he'd said to Cameron. He shouldn't have yelled at her for being upset. She had every right.

******

It was around 10 pm and Cameron was thinking about turning in for the night. It had been a long and emotionally stressful day, and sleep was probably the best option right now. She went to the kitchen and put her glass and bowl away. Suddenly, she heard the clatter of the mail box. She peered around the kitchen door and saw an envelope lying on the mat in front of the door. She slowly walked up to it, picked it up and opened it. Inside was what seemed to be a CD and there was a note attached to it. It said:

_I thought Tommy might say it better than I ever could. H x_

It was his familiar scrawly handwriting and the corners of Cameron's mouth perked up at his small kiss at the end, forgetting for a moment about their argument. She walked over to the CD player and placed the disc in. There was only one track on there and after pressing play, she sat down on the arm of the sofa and listened to the song.

A soft piano tune started to play, and in her mind, she pictured House playing it to her. Then, she heard the recognizable voice of Tommy Reeve and her eyes filled with tears as she listened. His voice was deep, but calming; just what she imagined House's voice would sound like.

**I know I wasn't there  
****When you needed me the most.  
****I know I didn't care  
****And was afraid to get so close.  
****Tonight it's getting hard to fall asleep  
****Cos it's becoming clear that I broke all into pieces  
****And I cannot reverse it  
****So I've got one more thing to say.**

**I'm sorry for your pain.  
****I'm sorry for your tears.  
****For all the little things I didn't know  
****I'm sorry for the words I didn't say.  
****But what I still do,  
****I'm still loving you.**

Cameron inhaled sharply at the lyrics sung so beautifully. He was sorry. He was sorry for her being upset and in pain and this song was the only way he could say it. He was sorry and he loved her. That was all she needed to hear. The tears tumbled from her eyes and she let out a slight laugh as the song continued.

**I know I let you wait.  
****Been away for far too long.  
****But now I can relate  
****To everything I did wrong.  
****Stop breathing when I think I'm loosing you.  
****They'll be no excuse so I'm on my knees  
****So listen please.  
****Let me hold your hand once again.**

He didn't want to loose her. She didn't want to loose him. He was all she'd ever wanted and arguing with him made her heart shatter.

**I'm sorry for your pain.  
****I'm sorry for your tears.  
****For all the little things I didn't know  
****I'm sorry for the words I didn't say.  
****I'm sorry for the lies  
****And I'm sorry for the fights.  
****For not showing my love, a dozen times  
****I'm sorry for the things that I call mine.  
****But what I still do,  
****I'm still loving you.**

**Ohh yeah. **

She laughed quietly again and wiped the tears with the back of her hand. The song was everything he wanted to say and more. He wasn't only sorry for fighting, but for not showing his love and that made her heart swell. She never knew he could be a romantic, but this song now meant more to her than any other.

**I'm sorry for your pain  
****And I'm sorry for your tears.  
****For all the little things I didn't know  
****I'm sorry for the words I didn't say.  
****I'm sorry for the lies  
****And I'm sorry for the fights.  
****For not showing my love, a dozen times.  
****I'm sorry for the things that I call mine.  
****But what I still do,  
****I'm still loving you.  
****That's what I'll always do. **

At the last line, Cameron broke down. She put her head in her hands and cried happy and sad tears. Then she wondered if he was still out there. Gathering herself, she quickly jumped off the sofa and made for the door. She whipped it open and revealed an empty hallway. She closed her eyes and sighed. She left the door open a crack and padded down the dark hallway in her socks, in hope he might still be there. When she couldn't see him, she sighed again, wondering what she was expecting and then turned around. Suddenly the front door of the building was pulled open and Cameron turned in surprise. Her breath caught in her throat as she saw House grab hold of her wrist. He tugged her closer to him and he cupped her cheek with his hand. His lips were hovering just above hers and she could feel his warm breath on her face.

"You didn't think I'd left, did you?" he said, so close to her lips she resisted the urge to strain upwards and kiss him.

Words couldn't seem to form in her mouth so she just shook her head.

"Musicians could always say it better than me." he mumbled, resting his forehead against hers. She melted into his touch, put her arms on his shoulders and slid her hands around his neck.

"I'm so sorry." he said sincerely and Cameron could honestly say she had never heard him say it like that before. "I didn't mean to upset you."

He leaned down a little further and he wrapped his free arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him. He lowered his head and softly brushed his lips against hers. Her hands laced through his short hair and she melted as his lips touched hers. He pulled away and looked into her eyes. They were red from crying and he gently wiped away a lonely tear with his thumb.

"I didn't mean to shout at you like that." whispered Cameron. "I was just tired."

House captured her lips in his again, stopping her from saying anything else. He was amazed at how soft and delicate her lips were but they lived up to all his expectations.

"You had every right to yell at me." he said in between kisses. "I'm a jerk."

Cameron smiled against his lips and her hands gripped his shoulders tighter, feeling the taught muscles beneath his jacket.

She ignored his last comment and then buried her head in his shoulder, hugging him tight. She was pleasantly surprised when she felt both his arms surround her and his head tuck into her neck. His arms tightened around her, stroking her back soothingly as he breathed in her wonderful scent. She smelled of vanilla and flowers and House made a permanent reminder of this. He closed his eyes for a moment, overwhelmed with the fact that she'd forgiven him.

"That song was beautiful." she said softly.

"I knew you'd like it. Every word was for you." he said with a smile and she pulled away to look into his amazing blue eyes.

"Really?" she asked, her voice shaky as tears threatened to fall again.

He cupped her cheek again and smiled, his thumb gently caressing her skin.

"Really." he stated before lowering his head again and meeting her lips in a soft kiss that showed her how he truly felt. Cameron felt his tongue brush against her lip and she willingly parted her lips for him.

Their kiss became deep and hungry, both needing each others touch more than anything else in the world. House's hand slipped under then hem of her over sized t-shirt and felt her flinch as his cold hands touched her warm back. He pulled her even closer to him, closing any space that was left between them as their tongues swept over each others. The feel of his rough hands against her smooth back and the occasionally brush of his stubble against her cheek felt more amazing than she'd ever imagined. The cold draft coming in from outside wasn't even an issue as his warm body pressed tightly against hers pushed out the cold. He shifted his head to the other side and met her lips again. His hands travelled down towards her small backside and when he groped it and pulled her even closer to him, their hips meeting, Cameron moaned into his mouth. She wanted, needed him more than ever.

**Sometimes, sorry really is all you need to say.**

* * *

_ Hope you liked it! Thank you for reading! :)_


End file.
